It's that time of the year when your perfectly curated Instagram feed goes haywire, your group chat just blows up with misinterpretations, and your laptop decides to stage a digital protest. Think of it as the universe hitting the rewind button-not to mess with you, okay, maybe a little-but to give you an opportunity to slow down, reassess, maybe even find that scrunchie you swore you lost 3 years ago.
So, mark your calendars-in with a big, glittery pen, obvi:
- March 14th-April 7th: Pisces to Aries. Imagine, if you will, a fire-breathing ram suddenly doing the backstroke in a dreamy fish tank. Expect some ardent backpedaling!
- July 17th-August 11th: Leo. The roar of the lion may be more of a confused meow. Time to tame the mane, rethink those grand plans.
- November 9th-29th: Sagittarius to Scorpio. From adventurous archer to secretive scorpion – this transition screams "double-check everything, especially your DMs."
It is an approximate date because it is always better to check when it is close than later.
Work and Career
First & foremost, expect communication chaos: emails disappear into the ether, meetings become a version of the telephone game, suddenly everyone's speaking a different language-even your barista.
Tech takes the worst hit: from glitches to crashed programs, to a spinning wheel of death that scoffs at you from inside your screen-the list goes on. Always back up your data! In all seriousness, treat your data the way you love your louboutin shoes-protect it with life!
Have a Plan B. And C. & D. Delays are inevitable; learn to embrace the beauty of unexpectedness. Use this time to reconsider what your dream really is: Was it ever that corner office, or was it running a cat cafe in Bali all along?
How to Staying Sane During the Retrograde Storm
- Stress Less: Yoga, meditation, bubble baths, binge-watching reality TV-whatever chills you out, do it. Think of it as your cosmic spa day.
- Communicate Effectively: Choose your words wisely. Like, don't send that late-night text you'll regret in the morning. Listen more than you speak (a revolutionary concept, I know).
- The Devil's in the Details: triple-check for everything. Appointments, deadlines, even your grocery list. A little extra attention given now can save you a major headache later.
- Digital Detox: Put the phone away. Move away from the laptop. Reconnect with the real world-outside your Instagram feed.
- Self-care is queen; pamper yourself like the queen that you are. Face masks, manicures, and pedicures, a weekend getaway-you deserve it.
- Go with the flow. Be flexible, don't freak out about unplanned detours en route. Approach it more like an adventure than a disaster. Lean on Your Crew: Call your friends, hug your dog, call your mom. Sharing the retrograde pain makes it so much more bearable.
Mercury Retrograde No-No's:
- Launching New Ventures: Hold your horses, babe. Mercury Retrograde is not the time to launch that new business, start a new relationship, or even try a new hairstyle unless you're feeling adventurous in a potentially disastrous way. You can definitely plan – prep, but hitting "go" should not happen at this time. It's more of a marinade-your-dreams thing, they will be so much tastier when the retrograde storm passes.
- Major life decisions: Don't propose, quit your job, either buy a timeshare on a whim. Big decisions require clear thinking. Doing so while Mercury is retrograde is like trying to navigate a maze blindfolded. Wait for clearer skies, darling.
- Shiny new gadgets & contracts: Avoid pre-ordering the latest gadget, or even worse, simply signing on the dotted line. There's a guaranteed chance of bugs, delays, miscommunications. Be patient, grasshopper.
- Digital Dependence: Back up everything! Print out the important documents. Don't wholly depend on the digital world. Just think of it as your stylish, old-school backup plan. When technology goes down-and it will-you are the one with the smug smile, holding a hard copy.
- No More Gossip Girl: The tea stays amongst you. Typically, most aspects are misconceived in this span of Mercury Retrograde transit only because it forms a breeding space for misconceiving or misexamples. Kindness-compassion-being the accessories who do not retire during such cosmos chaos.